I'm Not That Girl - Wicked

*Click on title of post and watch link from start to finish before reading further*
It's funny how much I relate to a fictional character.  The same character that later becomes known as The Wicked Witch of the West...touch of irony? *sigh*  What is, what was, what could have been.  I love my family, but damn me and my lack of self worth.  Damn me for not speaking up and fighting for something so long ago that was so very worth it.  Damn me that it still matters so much.  Damn me for not being able to JUST LET GO...I'M NOT THAT GIRL. *sigh*  Damn, damn, damn, damn, damn.  2:45am...up in less than 4 hours...This is what keeps me up tonight...

I'm Not That Girl
Hands touch, eyes meet, 
sudden silence, sudden heat 
hearts leap in a giddy world.  
He could be that boy, 
but I'm not that girl  
Don't dream too far, don't lose sight of who you are,  
don't remember that rush of joy. 
He could be that boy, 
I'm not that girl
Every so often we long to steal, 
to the land of what might have been, 
but that doesn't soften the ache we feel 
when reality sets back in  
Blythe smile, lithe limb  
she who's winsome,
she wins him, 
gold hair with a gentle curl, 
that's the girl he chose 
and heaven knows,  
I'm not that girl  
don't wish, don't start 
wishing only wounds the heart,
I wasn't born for the rose and the pearl, 
there's a girl I know,  
he loves her so, 
I'm not that girl.